Anonymous whispered,
I'm 19, male, and still a virgin. Needless to say, I'm not a bad looking guy and my options are actually very open right now. The thing is I get anxiety every time I think ima have sex. I just get very nervous and end up either backing down or just flaking. Sometimes I question my manhood lol. Anyways, I know its cause the fear of not lasting long. So I guess I'm looking for any advice, anything to comfort the anxiety.
I was the same way as you! I lost my virginity at 18 and I built it up to be this huge thing and it wasn’t that big a deal at all. Most men don’t last long their first time and it isn’t really expected of you to. What you should strive for is a quick recovery. Sure, you might last 10 minutes the first time, but tell her to give you a little while and round 2 will be half an hour. (The more you have sex, the more your stamina is built up, so this will actually work).
As far as how to last as long as possible - if you feel yourself getting close, switch positions or switch to oral. Work on being able to start and stop so you can prolong the experience as long as you can.
Basically, and I know this is counterintuitive, but anxiety will mess you up more than anything else. Go in calm and relaxed and make sure neither of you ever forgets the experience. If you find yourself freaking out, have a drink or a cigarette or some coffee or whatever you personally use to calm down beforehand. It’s important to let things happen without overanalyzing or freaking out. Hope I helped some!
-E